Русский ребёнок
by Band4Life
Summary: (Title means Russian Child- thanks to guest for correcting me :D) Jim took Chekov because he looked harmless. Alien species would not be able to hate him. But what happens when they're attacked? Pavel Chekov is the baby of the ship. But now he's the baby in a whole new meaning. Rated T for language (mostly Bones- okay, pretty much all Bones) just to be safe.
1. Introduction

"Go go go!" Jim shouted, ducking as a beam shot out, just barely missing him.

"Da, da, I em, Keptin!" Pavel answered, frantic as he skidded around a corner. Jim thought this was supposed to be a peaceful race. Clearly uncharted territory should have remained so. Jim rounded a corner and found Chekov was already ducking under a large metal duct, and sprinted after him. "Нет, нет, не стреляй!" he exclaimed, slipping back in his natural language in his frightened state before there was a flash and a shout.

The attack stopped immediately. Jim hit the ground, sliding under the duct. He caught no sight of Chekov, searching frantically. "Chekov!" he shouted, whirling around. He couldn't lose Chekov. He was important, and everyone would kill him if he lost the kid. He reminded himself that that's all Chekov was, a seventeen year old kid. He couldn't lose him…

"Помоги мне, капитан." Jim whipped around, eyes wide. "Holy…" big brown eyes filled with tears peeked at him under a mop of blonde curls, and Jim noticed the too big yellow shirt draped on his small frame. He couldn't be more than two or three. He sniffled, tilting his head at the captain. Doe Eyes kept his sights on Jim, very slowly lifting his arms- the sleeves much too long, hanging well past his hands.

"Um…" was all that fell past Jim's lips. What the hell had just happened? Doe Eyes- Chekov, as impossible as it may be, he reminded himself- reached out towards Jim with a bit more insistence, and he couldn't help but scoop the kid into his arms. He immediately attached himself to Jim, curling close, letting out the most pitiful sounding whimper he'd ever heard from a child. "Sh, no, don't cry. Um…" he held the boy close, grabbing Chekov's pants and underwear- the kid might still want those when he was seventeen again- and ordered to be beamed back onto the Enterprise. He eyed the pants in one hand and the kid in the other.

He'd have some explaining to do.

* * *

Нет, нет, не стреляй- no, no, do not shoot

Помоги мне, капитан.- help me, captain

AN: So! This is just an introduction, as it says on the chapter teller thingy. So, what do you think is gonna happen? Cute little Chekov will be a quiet, sweet little babe, or a surprising troublemaker? Or both? So, tell me what you think, and I will have Chapter one up... sometime this week. (Also, I have been listening to Starships by Nicki Minaj and I keep singing it in a Russian accent, just thought you should know) Oops I almost didn't mention... THANK YOU FOR READING!


	2. Chapter 1

AN: I am so sorry it's up late! I meant to have this up last weekend! I've been a bit busy, though, and I've also started watching Merlin (I've officially sold my soul to Merlin) But, nevertheless, I hope this chapter is enjoyed!

* * *

Jim cradled the boy close as the crew of the Enterprise came into view. Doe Eyes- Chekov, he chastised himself- peeked at them, shrinking back at the hushed murmurs. "So, before any of you ask where Chekov is, we got attacked. And, as much as the idea is completely off the wall… this is him." Jim couldn't help but notice that even Spock seemed a little surprised. "They aren't exactly friendly, but they're not bad guys either." the captain lowered Chekov to the floor, and was both surprised and relieved he didn't start crying. "Someone watch him, please, and let's get back to work." Jim ordered. Pavel toddled after him, babbling quiet Russian to himself.

"Капитан, капитан [captain, captain]…" he caught sight of Uhura and changed direction, smiling up at her and reaching up to be held. "довольно матери [pretty mother]." Uhura couldn't help but smile, lifting him into her arms.

"Captain, if I may suggest.." Spock began, and Jim turned to look at him.

"Suggest away." came the immediate response. Spock appeared calm, though he was not fond of being interrupted.

"It would be logical to take him to the medbay for observation, would it not? Lieutenant Uhura's productivity will suffer a twenty-seven percent decline if he remains here." Jim sighed. Of course he'd have worked out the math already. Jim got up from his chair and reached out to pluck Chekov from Uhura. He clung to her, his sleeves bunched up on his arms. Now that his hands were freed his clinging seemed much more effective, and he let out a small whine. When the captain tried to pick him up his mouth dropped open and he let out a wail, burying his face in Uhura's shoulder. Uhura hushed him, tipping his chin up.

"Вы должны пойти к врачу и быть хорошим мальчиком [you will go to the doctor and be a good boy]." she said softly, and he pouted, and Jim would be lying if it wasn't the cutest damn thing he'd ever seen. Pavel shook his head, eyes widening in an unmistakable plea- no, that was the cutest damn thing he'd ever seen.

"Нет доктор [no doctor]!" he answered, shaking his head in a clear protest. He curled closer to her again and turned the pout up to full blast. "Я останусь с вами [I'll stay with you]!" Uhura offered a small smile, shaking her head.

"Павел, будь хорошим мальчиком для капитана [Pavel, be a good boy for the captain]." she said softly, and he blinked up at her before giving a small sigh, allowing Uhura to pass him to Jim, tilting his head to look at his captain with inquisitive eyes.

* * *

"Bones!" Jim called as he entered the medbay. He was immediately greeted by a nurse, who smiled at Pavel. He pulled the collar of his shirt over his face, his brunette curls the only thing visible. Jim tried to tug the shirt back down and was met with the quickest Russian babble he had ever heard.

"What are you doing in the medbay?" the captain looked up and rubbed the back of his neck. How to put it…

"So Ensign Chekov got turned into a kid and… so… monitor him." Bones sighed as Pavel lowered his collar until his eyes came into view. He tilted his head, and the doctor frowned, glaring at Jim.

"Dammit Jim, I'm a Doctor, not a babysitter!" he snapped, and Pavel pulled his collar up again.

"Come on, Bones. He can't be on the bridge. He's harmless. He pretty much just speaks Russian and looks at things. Seriously." after a few moments of thought, Bones sighed.

"If he breaks anything, it's your fault."

* * *

Bones scrambled behind a table, trying to find the fucking kid. He heard a soft babbling, following it. He was definitely gonna kill Jim for this. Definitely. Bones finally found Chekov sitting on the floor, looking at a hypospray with mild interest, which he snatched out of his hands.

"Dammit, you can't play with this stuff!" he scolded the kid, putting the hypospray in it's proper spot and plucking up Chekov, plopping him down on a cot. "Sleep, for god's sake." Chekov tilted his head as the doctor retreated before he went to climb down. "Hey!" McCoy barked, eyes narrowed. The kid refused to fucking listen.

Pavel jumped, head whipping around to look at Bones, regarding him with wide eyes. A moment later his eyes were filled with tears, bottom lip jutting out. _Oh no, fuck no, no crying, crying is bad shit shit shit what to do what to do?_ He searched frantically for something that would keep the kid from crying. _Shit shit shit hurry up!_

His eyes fixed on the chocolates Jim had brought in. What the fuck were they? Kisses, or something. Another failed attempt with one of his nurses- who were under strict orders not to speak to the captain. He snatched one and unwrapped it, holding it out to the boy. He scrubbed the tears from his face, eyeing the chocolate before he held out his hand. He inspected the chocolate a moment. He then popped it in his mouth, eyes lighting up as he chewed.

"If I give you another one, will you quit crying?" Bones asked. Bribing could work. Bribing worked on kids. Right? Sure enough, Pavel nodded, wiping his nose on his sleeve. Bones gave him another chocolate, not bothering to watch the boy devour it. As he went about his work, he tossed Chekov chocolates for good behavior. Sitting quietly? Have a chocolate. Staying in one fucking place? Chocolate it is!

Soon, the staying in one place thing was no longer in effect. "Скатертью, скатертью дальний путь стелется И упирается прямо в небосклон. Каждому, каждому в лучшее верится, Катится, катится голубой вагон." he sang, a bit of chocolate on his mouth. He beamed at the doctor as he climbed to the floor, spinning a bit as he continued to sing. It was the exact same thing he'd just sung! God dammit he was not going to listen to this… Chekov giggled as his shirt swished around him, and soon he fell over dizzily and erupted into a fit of giggles. Hyper. _Hyper_. Shit.

Chekov scurried past McCoy, who sighed. "Get back here!" he ordered as the boy disappeared through the door. God dammit. "Chekov!" he shouted, before letting loose a stream of curses and running after him. It wasn't too hard to keep following him. Just follow the singing. "Dammit, not a fucking babysitter… gonna find a goddamn airlock…" he grumbled, skidding around a corner. He growled when he saw a gold flash dart around another corner. "Chekov, _get back here_!" he yelled, nearly slamming into the wall as he tried to sprint around the corner. He froze, looking down the empty corridor. _Where the fuck did he go?_

* * *

AN: HELLO! How has it been? Also, where do you think Chekov is? Also, what he was singing was a song called Blue Wagon, I found it while I was writing- yes, I was listening to songs in Russian. Anyway, it is sung by Crocodile Gena and it translates to 'Smoothly, smoothly the long path spreads ahead of us, And runs straight into horizon, Everyone should believe and hope fort the best, And our blue train is streaming ahead'. I strongly suggest you listen to the full song! It is very beautiful, in my opinion, and catchy! Anyway, what do you think lies in store for Bones? Chekov? What about the rest of the crew? Ah, my note is running long, I'm sorry! Good day, and happy reading! Ciao!


End file.
